Of Human Bondage
by W. Somerset Maugham

read by Jessa Crispin

Every once and a while you come across a book at exactly the right time in your life. Some events are still fresh enough to smart, but far enough in the past to see clearly. And when a novel comes along with a character going through the same thing, it crushes you with its clarity. Reading someone else's identical mistakes can be wrenching. And yet, it adds a perspective you've never seen before, and you're able to finally make connections to figure out what the hell you were thinking.

Of Human Bondage was that book for me. I empathized with Philip very early in the book, and as his life became a disaster, I grew more and more uneasy. Philip's story is not an enjoyable one to read for anyone, I guess. His parents die when he is nine, he grows up in a strict Christian environment, he has a clubfoot, etc. It's not a cheery novel, but neither is it a truly overcoming-adversity novel. It's more of a warts-and-all exposition of truly fucking up with a mostly happy ending.

Bondage is also the most thorough coming of age novel I believe I have ever read. You really see Philip's belief system change and go through every stage. Maugham doesn't just hint as philosophical development, he writes out Philip's conversations about God, Kant, and art. While it makes for occasional slow reading, it gives you a fully developed sense of who this character is as he grows from nine into his 30's by the end. And along the way there are the usual missteps: putting your faith in people who don't care, neglecting the people who raised you, sexual obsession, the works.

Because of my personal connection with the book, however, I'm not sure I would recommend it. I have no idea what other people's reactions to the book would be. I've been asked if I liked it, and each time I can only shrug. It's difficult to vocalize an opinion when really it's just a gut reaction.

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